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Hello All,

I stumbled across a bunch of old Chuck Norris jokes while surfing the net, and what better way to start the week than to share a good laugh with you. Enjoy.

Chuck Norris sets ants on fire with a magnifying glass... At NIGHT!

Bigfoot takes pictures of chuck Norris

God said "let their be light", chuck Norris said "say please"

Chuck Norris don't read books, he stares them down until he gets the information he needs

Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch, he DECIDES what time it is

Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ...All of it.

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

There are no such things as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks

chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird

While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium

Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

chuck norris puts the "laughter" in manslaughter

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

After taking a steroids test doctors informed Chuck Norris that he had tested positive. He laughed upon receiving this information, and said "of course my urine tested positive, what do you think they make steroids from?"

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

..lol
 

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Chuck Norris was his stage name!!!------Carlos Norris is his real name!!! A real World Champion in the Middle weight class too, before he was talked into making movie's on the big screen!!! break em all Jeff
 

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Chuck Norris commutes in Optimus Prime
 
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