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You old enough to remember Burma Shave signs??OT.

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by Bocephas, Dec 29, 2008.

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  1. Bocephas

    Bocephas Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    1,019
    Here are a few.Don't pass cars on curve or hill.if the cops don't get you,the morticians will.

    It's best for one who hits the bottle; To let another use the throttle.

    On the curve ahead,remember Sonny;That rabbit's foot didn't save the bunny.

    He tried to cross as fast train neared,death didn't draft him,he volunteered.

    Bo
     
  2. shannon391

    shannon391 Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    4,477
    The big bad wolf

    so neat and trim

    Little Red Riding hood is chasing him
     
  3. Trap2

    Trap2 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    3,685
    Location:
    Redding, California
    His cheek
    Was rough
    His chick vamoosed
    And now she won't
    Come home to roost

    Burma-Shave The place to pass
    On curves
    You know
    Is only at
    A beauty show

    Burma-Shave On curves ahead
    Remember, sonny
    That rabbit's foot
    Didn't save
    The bunny

    Burma-Shave
    Twinkle, twinkle
    One-eyed car
    We all wonder
    WHERE you are

    Burma-Shave These signs
    We gladly
    Dedicate
    To men who've had
    No date of late

    Burma-Shave A guy
    Who drives
    A car wide open
    Is not thinkin'
    He's just hopin'

    Burma-Shave
    A whiskery kiss
    For the one
    You adore
    May not make her mad
    But her face will be sore

    Burma-Shave His brush is gone
    So what'll we do
    Said Mike Robe I
    To Mike Robe II

    Burma-Shave If your peach
    Keeps out
    Of reach
    Better practice
    What we preach

    Burma-Shave
    When Super-shaved
    Remember, pard
    You'll still get slapped
    But not so hard

    Burma-Shave Burma-Shave
    Was such a boom
    They passed
    The bride
    And kissed the groom To kiss
    A mug
    That's like a cactus
    Takes more nerve
    Than it does practice

    Burma-Shave
    The whale
    Put Jonah
    Down the hatch
    But coughed him up
    Because he scratched

    Burma-Shave Violets are blue
    Roses are pink
    On graves
    Of those
    Who drive and drink

    Burma-Shave Candidate says
    Campaign
    Confusing
    Babies kiss me
    Since I've been using
    Burma-Shave

    My job is
    Keeping faces clean
    And nobody knows
    De stubble
    I've seen

    Burma-Shave Doesn't
    Kiss you
    Like she useter?
    Perhaps she's seen
    A smoother rooster!!

    Burma-Shave No use
    Knowing
    How to pick 'em
    If your half-shaved Whiskers stick 'em

    Burma-Shave
    He tried
    To cross
    As fast train neared
    Death didn't draft him
    He volunteered

    Burma-Shave Her chariot
    Raced 80 per
    They hauled away
    What had
    Ben Her

    Burma-Shave She will
    Flood your face
    With kisses 'Cause you smell
    So darn delicious

    Burma-Shave Lotion
    Use Burma-Shave
    In tube
    Or jar
    Then follow up
    With our new star

    Burma-Shave Lotion It has a tingle
    And a tang
    That starts
    The day off
    With a bang

    Burma-Shave
    Lotion Bracing as
    An ocean breeze
    For after shaving
    It's sure
    To please

    Burma-Shave Lotion
    For early
    Morning
    Pep and bounce
    A brand new product
    We announce

    Burma-Shave Lotion The ladies
    Take one whiff
    And purr--
    It's no wonder
    Men prefer

    Burma-Shave Lotion His face
    Was smooth
    And cool as ice
    And oh! Louise!
    He smelled so nice

    Burma-Shave Lotion
    I'd heard it praised
    By drug store clerks
    I tried the stuff
    Hot dog!
    It works

    Burma-Shave Train wrecks few
    Reason clear
    Fireman
    Never hugs
    Engineer

    Burma-Shave Altho insured
    Remember, kiddo
    They don't pay you
    They pay
    Your widow
    Burma-Shave
    advertisement
     
  4. j2jake

    j2jake Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    2,285
  5. cle

    cle Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    228
    Free, Free,
    A trip to Mars,
    For 10,000 Empty Jars
     
  6. Old Texas Marine

    Old Texas Marine Member

    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2008
    Messages:
    529
  7. stokinpls

    stokinpls Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    6,484
    Cattle Crossing means go slow, that old bull is some cow's beau. - that one used to be next to my house.

    Whenever passing on a slope, always use a periscope.

    Pity all the little Caesers, they had to tend their beards with tweezers.
     
  8. Bocephas

    Bocephas Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    1,019
    She eyed his beard and said no dice

    I'LL cook the the rice.

    Drinking drivers

    Enhance their chance to highball home in an ambulance.

    Don't stick your elbow out so far.It might go home in another car.

    Bo
     
  9. deuce

    deuce Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    58
    Around the curve
    lickety split,
    it's a beautiful car
    wasn't it?

    Dina doesn't treat
    him right,
    but if he'd shave
    Dinamite.
     
  10. LDAdd

    LDAdd TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    290
    My neighbor (near 80 years old) is the son of the originator of the Burma Shave product and has a set of signs hanging on his long side porch and more in the garage. He also has a book of all the "dittys" that his dad or someone published. And yes, I definately remember them all along the old two-lane highways in my youth.

    Larry Addison
     
  11. cle

    cle Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    228
    Several books on Burma Shave signs. "Verse By The Side of The Road." is one.
     
  12. Dr.Longshot

    Dr.Longshot Banned Banned

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    5,722
    Yes the good Ole times, I remember them.



    Gary Bryant
    Dr.longshot
     
  13. X Trap 2

    X Trap 2 TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    1,125
    I do, and thanks for the name of the book. I just finished going to ebay and buying a 1977 first edition book in hard cover with the dust jacket. Maybe the kids will get a few laughs too.Ray.......
     
  14. Big Heap

    Big Heap TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    1,748
    Corection: It was 900 empty jars to go to Mars. I'm still saving up.
     
  15. School Teacher

    School Teacher Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    2,052
    Location:
    Louisville, KY
    I remember them well as they were all over the rural Midwest.

    Bristles scratched his cookies map,
    That's what maid poor Ginger snap!
    Burma Shave


    Ed Ward
     
  16. Brian in Oregon

    Brian in Oregon Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    25,238
    Location:
    Deplorable Bitter Clinger in Liberal La La Land
    A farmer protested the poor condition of a stretch of Highway 47 between McMinnville and Banks, Oregon a couple of decades ago. I called his signs "Burma Pave". I have pics of it somewhere, probably in the attic.<br>
    <br>
    Old Highway 47<br>
    <br>
    We travel in fear.<br>
    <br>
    Only gets worse<br>
    <br>
    Year after year.<br>
    <br>
    When citizens complained<br>
    <br>
    The State's head they did scratch.<br>
    <br>
    The only answer they had.<br>
    <br>
    A very thin patch.<br>
    <br>
    FIX HIGHWAY 47 NOW!
     
  17. BRGII

    BRGII TS Member

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2008
    Messages:
    740
    That I remember, Brian, now that you have posted it. About early 80's I think.
     
  18. tbuster

    tbuster Member

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    Jun 2, 2006
    Messages:
    145
    Thirty days hath September, April June and the speed offender.
     
  19. Savage99Stan

    Savage99Stan Active Member

    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2007
    Messages:
    1,081
    When your face gets rough and red,
    Trade it in for another head..
    or Burma Shave
     
  20. Wahoo

    Wahoo TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    264
    Roost here birds but don't get funny,
    Remember that these signs cost money - Burma Shave.
     
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