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wal mart greeter

Discussion in 'Uncategorized Threads' started by hossman, Feb 3, 2008.

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  1. hossman

    hossman TS Member

    Jul 2, 2007
    My goal when I am old/older is to be a Walmart greeter. I shall have
    to remember this important information. A manager at Wal-Mart had the task of hiring someone to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job. The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table,
    the interviewer asked, "What is the fastest thing you know of?"
    Acknowledging the first man on his right, the man replied, "A THOUGHT." It just pops into your head. There's no warning. "That's very good!"replied the interviewer. "And, now you sir?", he asked the second man. "Hmmm...let me see. "A blink! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of." "Excellent!" said the interviewer. "The blink of an eye, that's a very popular cliché for speed. "He then turned to the third man, who was contemplating his reply. "Well, out at my dad's ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light on the barn comes on in less than an instant. "Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of" The interviewer was very impressed with the third answer and thought he had found his man. "It's hard to beat the speed of light," he said. Turning to Bubba, the fourth and final man, the interviewer posed the same question. Old Bubba replied, "After hearing the previous three answers, it's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA." "WHAT!?"said the interviewer, stunned by the response. "Oh sure", said Old Bubba. "You see, the other day I wasn't feeling so good, and I ran for the bathroom, but before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already shit my pants."
    Old Bubba is now the new greeter at a Wal-Mart near you! You
    probably will think of this every time you enter a Wal-Mart from now on!.... Have a good day!!
  2. Bocephas

    Bocephas Well-Known Member

    Jan 29, 1998
    hoss, my sides are hurting.


    BILL GRILL Well-Known Member

    Sep 18, 2006
  4. Ivabigun

    Ivabigun TS Member

    Jan 29, 1998
    I already have a few out fits to greet people at the local Wal-Mart store so how much are they paying.

    I also got some white out fits for Sunday's.

  5. ivanhoe

    ivanhoe Well-Known Member

    Jan 29, 1998
    Oxford MA
    Here is another good Wal-Mart story.

    A woman goes into Wal-Mart to buy a rod and reel for her
    grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get so she just
    grabs one and goes over to the counter. A Wal-Mart associate is
    standing there wearing dark shades.
    She says, "Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about this rod
    and reel?"
    He says, "Ma'am, I'm completely blind; but if you'll drop it on
    the counter, I can tell you everything you need to know about it from
    the sound it makes.
    She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway.
    He says, "That's a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco
    404 reel and 10-LB. Test line. It's a good all around combination; and
    it's on sale this week for only $ 20.00."
    She says, "It's amazing that you can tell all that just by! the
    sound of it dropping on the counter. I'll take it!" As she opens her
    purse, her credit card drops on the floor.
    "Oh, that sounds like a Master Card," he says.
    She bends down to pick it up and accidentally breaks wind. At
    first she is really embarrassed, but then realizes there is no way the
    blind clerk could tell it was she who tooted. Being blind, he wouldn't
    know that she was the only person around.
    The man rings up the sale and says, "That'll be $34.50 please. "
    The woman is totally confused by this and asks, "Didn't you tell
    me it was on sale for $20.00? How did you get $34.50?"
    He replies, "Yes, Ma'am. The rod and reel is $20.00, but the Duck
    Call is $11.00 and the Catfish Bait is $3.50."

    Bob Lawless
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