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True Love humor

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by Barrelbulge(Fl), Sep 25, 2009.

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  1. Barrelbulge(Fl)

    Barrelbulge(Fl) TS Supporters TS Supporters

    Aug 27, 2007
    West Central Florida
    Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas
    Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks went down easy. He
    didn't even remember how he got home from the party.

    Jack had to force himself to open his eyes,... the first thing he sees is a
    couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table with a single

    Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.
    He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order. So is the
    rest of the house.

    He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at
    him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of
    the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his
    wife in lipstick: 'Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get
    groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling!
    Love, Jillian'

    He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is a hot breakfast, hot
    coffee, and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating.

    Jack asks, 'What happened last night?'

    'Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over
    the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got
    that black eye when you ran into the door.

    Confused, he asked his son, 'So, why is everything in such perfect order and
    so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table?'

    His son replies, 'Oh THAT!... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she
    tried to take your pants off, you screamed, 'Leave me alone, I'm married!!'

    Broken Coffee Table: $239.99
    Hot Breakfast: $4.20
    Two Aspirins: $.38
    Saying the right thing, at the right time: PRICELESS
  2. Bruce Specht

    Bruce Specht Well-Known Member

    Jan 29, 1998
    Near but not in chicago
    lmao EXCELLENT
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