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The older crowd*** How true*** Humor

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by Barrelbulge(Fl), Feb 19, 2011.

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  1. Barrelbulge(Fl)

    Barrelbulge(Fl) Banned User Banned TS Supporters

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2007
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    Location:
    West Central Florida
    THE OLDER CROWD

    A distraught senior citizen Phoned her doctor's office.
    'Is it true,' she wanted to know, 'that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?'
    'Yes, I'm afraid so,' the doctor told her.
    There was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied,
    I'm wondering, then,just how serious is my condition because this prescription is marked 'NO REFILLS'.'
    ***********************

    An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, A renowned surgeon,perform the operation.
    As he was about to get the anesthesia,He asked to speak to his son.
    'Yes, Dad, what is it? '
    'Don't be nervous, son;
    Do your best and just remember,if it doesn't go well,if something happens to me,your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife....'

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Aging:
    Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age
    And start bragging about it..
    ---------------------------------
    The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
    ---------------------------------

    Some people try to turn back their odometers.
    Not me! I want people to know 'why' I look this way.
    I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
    ********************

    When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth,
    Think of Algebra.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
    -------------------------------

    One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.
    Ah, being young is beautiful,but being old is comfortable.

    First you forget names,then you forget faces.Then you forget to pull up your zipper.It's worse when you forget to pull it down.
    ---------------------------------

    Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks,it was called witchcraft...Today, it's called golf.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Two guys one old one young are pushing their carts around Wal-Mart when they collide. The old guy says to the young guy, 'Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going. The young guy says, 'That's OK, it's a coincidence.
    I'm looking for my wife, too...'I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate' The old guy says, 'Well, Maybe I can help you find her..
    What does she look like?'
    ' The young guy says,'Well, she is 27 yrs old, tall,With red hair,Blue eyes, is boxum, wearing no bra, Long legs,And is wearing short shorts.
    What does your wife look like?'
    To which the first old guy says, 'Doesn't matter,--- let's look for yours.'
    *********************

    Lord,
    Keep Your arm around my shoulder,
    And, Your hand over my mouth!
     
  2. GW22

    GW22 Active Member

    Joined:
    Feb 19, 2008
    Messages:
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    That's pretty good!

    -Gary
     
  3. Dahaub

    Dahaub Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    1,309
    Two members of the old folks home were sitting on a bench and after a long silence the one looks at the other and said, "you know Harry I like you, you never complain and bitch like the others in the nursing home and dern it you are older than I am by two years and I hurt all over all the time. How do you do it?" Harry replied to him that he lives like a new-born. New born? His buddy asks, "How's that?" Harry then told him " Well I ain't got no hair and I ain't got no teeth and I'm pretty sure I just peed my pants." :) Dan
     
  4. capulona

    capulona TS Member

    Joined:
    Nov 28, 2010
    Messages:
    341
    Here's my favorite video of the senior crowd boating:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZZ_7Rn4jVI

    Tell me how funny this is
     
  5. Barrelbulge(Fl)

    Barrelbulge(Fl) Banned User Banned TS Supporters

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2007
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    Location:
    West Central Florida
    Little easier
    <object style="height: 390px; width: 640px"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/hZZ_7Rn4jVI?version=3"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/hZZ_7Rn4jVI?version=3" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="640" height="390"></object>
     
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