Tree Hugger A woman from Los Angeles, CA, who was a tree hugger, a liberal, and an anti-hunter, purchased a piece of timberland near Colville, WA. On the highest point on the tract there was a very large tree. Wanting a good view of the natural splendor of her land she started to climb this tree. As she neared the top she encountered a spotted owl that attacked her and in her haste to escape, the woman slid down the tree to the ground and got many splinters in her crotch. In considerable pain, she hurried the Mt. Carmel ER to see a doctor. She told him she was an environmentalist, a democrat, and an anti-hunter and how she came to get all the splinters. The doctor listened to her story with great patience and then told her to go wait in the examining room and he would see if he could help her. After waiting three hours before the doctor reappeared, the angry woman demanded, "What took you so long?" He smiled and then told her, "Well, I had to get permits from the Environmental Protection Agency, the Forest Service, and the Bureau of Land Management before I could remove old-growth timber from a recreational area. I'm sorry, but due to Obama Care, they turned me down."