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OT Funny !!!!

Discussion in 'Uncategorized Threads' started by FarmerD, Oct 2, 2007.

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  1. FarmerD

    FarmerD TS Member

    Jan 29, 1998
    Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant.

    After ordering their cornbread and beans they talk about the latest addition

    to their junkyard business.

    Suddenly a woman at a nearby table who is eating a sandwich begins to cough.

    After a minute or so it becomes apparent that she is in real distress. One of

    the hillbillies looks at her and says, "Kin ya swaller?'

    The woman shakes her head. "Kin ya breathe?" She shakes her head.

    The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head NO.

    The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up the back of her dress, yanks

    down her drawers and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue.

    The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and expels the obstruction which flies out of her mouth.

    As she begins to breathe again, the hillbilly walks back to his seat.

    His partner says " Ya know, I'd heered 'bout that there Hind Lick Maneuver,

    but I ain't never seed nobody do it."
  2. Bvr Tail

    Bvr Tail Well-Known Member

    Jan 29, 1998
    A guy runs into a bar, panting, out of breath, leans on the bar and says "Quick bartender, give me a beer before the fight!"

    The bartender quickly pours him a cold one, looking all over the bar for the problem.

    The guy downs it in one gulp, runs to the door and back, then says "Quick bartender, another one before the fight!!"

    The bartender just as quick, pours him another beer, runs to the door, doesn't see anything, and returns just as the guy is finishing the second beer.

    The bartender says "Hey, I looked all over the bar, and all up and down the street, what fight you talkin' about?"

    The guy says "The fight when I tell you I don't have any money!!"

  3. ec90t

    ec90t Guest

    One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his
    wife "Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in Slim Fast. Maybe
    it would take a few inches off of your butt!!"

    His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't
    let such a comment go unrewarded.

    The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his
    drawer. "What the Hell is this??" he said to himself as a little
    "dust" cloud appeared when he shook them out.

    "April," he hollered into the bathroom, "Why did you put talcum
    powder in my underwear?"

    She replied with a snicker...
    "It's not talcum powder......
    It's 'Miracle Grow'."

  4. Hipshot 3

    Hipshot 3 TS Member

    Sep 14, 2007
    Two old trapshooters in their 90's were talking on the range. Henry says to Elmer....."Elmer, is it true you just married a beautiful 22 yr old beauty queen?"........"I sure did,Elmer replied". Then Henry said..." Don't you think thats a little risky, making love to a young girl like that at your age?"......Elmer scratched his head and said "Nope,.......if she dies,she dies!"
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