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O/T Humor Things you won't hear a Southerner say.

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by Shooting Jack, Oct 6, 2011.

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  1. Shooting Jack

    Shooting Jack Active Member

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    O/T Humor Things you won

    THE TOP 31 THINGS YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY:

    31. When I retire, I'm movin' north.

    30. Oh I just couldn't, she's only eighteen.

    29. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.

    28. Duct tape won't fix that.

    27. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken

    26. We don't keep firearms in this house.

    25. You can't feed that to the dog.

    24. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.

    23. Wrestling is fake.

    22. We're vegetarians.

    21. Do you think my gut is too big?

    20. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.

    19. Honey, we don't need another dog.

    18. Who gives a damn who won the Civil War?

    17. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.

    16. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.

    15. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.

    14. Trim the fat off that steak.

    13. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.

    12. The tires on that truck are too big.

    11. I've got it all on the C: DRIVE.

    10. Unsweetened tea tastes better.

    9. My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.

    8. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.

    7. Checkmate

    6. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.

    5. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.

    4. I don't have a favorite college team.

    3. You Guys.

    2. Those shorts really ought to be a little longer, Betty Mae.
    AND THE NUMBER ONE THING THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY:
    1. Nope, no more for me. I'm driving!





    Now Wasn't that funny. Jackie B.
     
  2. Catpower

    Catpower Molon Labe TS Supporters

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    Those are good ones Jackie
     
  3. DONNE

    DONNE Member

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    Here's another one ..............

    All you yankees , come on down. Y'all are welcome here ................
     
  4. daddiooo

    daddiooo TS Supporters TS Supporters

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    What you will hear from a Tennessee good ol' boy:

    When driving on ice and your pickup truck is sliding out of control and headed toward the ditch:


    "Here....hold my beer, I'm gonna' try somethin'"
     
  5. Shooting Jack

    Shooting Jack Active Member

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    Daddiioo, been there done that. LOL Jackie B.
     
  6. pweld

    pweld TS Member

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    Hey I resemble them remarks!!!!

    Paul Welden
     
  7. BILL GRILL

    BILL GRILL Well-Known Member

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    Donne, obviously you have been there! LOL
     
  8. capulona

    capulona TS Member

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    You can't marry her, she's your cousin!
     
  9. WS-1

    WS-1 Banned User Banned

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    Easy Cap! It's not considered good manners to bring up Family.
     
  10. capulona

    capulona TS Member

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    LOL! My humblest apologies - I recently watch Deliverance. If you haven't seen this film, make sure you put it on your list!
     
  11. quartering

    quartering Active Member

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    replaced all the window units with a central air system
     
  12. quartering

    quartering Active Member

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    "don't watch this!"
     
  13. DONNE

    DONNE Member

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    Bill Grill , been there ? I live there .............:)
     
  14. HSLDS

    HSLDS Well-Known Member

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    What's the last thing a southerner says before dying?

    "Hey y'all, check this out!"

    ;-)
     
  15. RickN

    RickN Well-Known Member

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