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News headlines*** Sunday humor

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by Barrelbulge(Fl), Jul 18, 2010.

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  1. Barrelbulge(Fl)

    Barrelbulge(Fl) Banned User Banned TS Supporters

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2007
    Messages:
    11,666
    Location:
    West Central Florida
    Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter
    This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day. I called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!

    I just couldn't help but sending this along. Too funny..
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------
    Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
    No crap, really?
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------ Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
    Now that's taking things a bit far!
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------ Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
    What a guy!
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------ Miners Refuse to Work after Death
    Good-for-nothing lazy so-and-so's!
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------ Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
    See if that works any better than a fair trial!
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------
    War Dims Hope for Peace
    I can see where it might have that effect!
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------
    If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
    Ya think?!
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------ Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
    Who would have thought! Send this to Al Gore!
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------ Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
    They may be on to something!
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------ Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
    You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
    Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
    He probably IS the battery charge!
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- -------
    Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
    That's what he gets for eating those beans!
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
    Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
    Do kids taste like chicken?
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
    Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
    Chainsaw Massacre all over again!
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
    Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
    Boy, are they tall!
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
    And the winner is....
    Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
    Did I read that right?
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -

    Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to. We all need a good laugh at least once a day!
     
  2. Pull & Mark

    Pull & Mark Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2006
    Messages:
    5,416
    Tanks for the good laugh!!! Break-em all. Jeff
     
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