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NEW ELEMENT discovered

Discussion in 'Uncategorized Threads' started by Jim101, May 12, 2008.

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  1. Jim101

    Jim101 Active Member

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    Worth a chuckle. Jim


    Subject: New Element Found


    A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of
    the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been
    named "Governmentium." Governmentium has one neutron, 12 assistant
    neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 224 assistant deputy neutrons,
    giving it an atomic mass of 312.


    These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which
    are surrounded by vast quantities of particles called peons. Since
    Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be
    detected because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into
    contact. A minute amount of Governmentium causes one reaction to take
    over four days to complete, when it would normally take less than a
    second.


    Governmentium has a normal half-life of 4 years; it does not decay,
    but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the
    assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact,
    Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each
    reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming
    isodopes.


    This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to
    believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain
    quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to
    as "Critical Morass." When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes
    Administratium, an element, which radiates just as much energy as the
    Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many
    morons.
     
  2. nipper

    nipper TS Member

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    and we keep voting the same ones right back in dont we, but not this round

    bill
     
  3. Tron

    Tron Supporting Vendor Supporting Vendor

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    Kitty says that he finds it very sad that you are this easily amused...then he said "Tsk, Tsk, Tsk".

    Tron
     
  4. Jim101

    Jim101 Active Member

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    PBB, I didn't write it, Got it in an e-mail, But I share your views on the situation.










    Jim
     
  5. Tripod

    Tripod Well-Known Member

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    Iowa man!!
    I think you should only be allowed to vote if you are paying taxes or at least not on some form of government subsidy. Far too many people decide how to spend someone else's tax dollars.
     
  6. Quack Shot

    Quack Shot Active Member

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    What good is it if you can't melt it down and turn it into shot? On second thought, it sounds WAY too expensive! :)
     
  7. birdogs

    birdogs TS Member

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    "I'm from the government and I am here to help."
    Ronald Reagan
    Scariest Words
     
  8. Mike Michalski

    Mike Michalski Member

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    tripod, How about really putting some serious criteria on voting? Like mandatory military service with an honorable discharge. Or maybe a history of honestly filed and paid taxes. Or, how about no criminal convictions for anything, ever.

    Come on now, this is America and the right to vote comes with Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness, right?
     
  9. Mike Michalski

    Mike Michalski Member

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    DanBee, When "Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness" was written, there were no taxes.
     
  10. tomk2

    tomk2 Member

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    I think the original version was Life, Liberty, and Property. But forseeing the future eminent domain fiasco, they changed it to pursuit of happiness.
     
  11. Mike Michalski

    Mike Michalski Member

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    DanBee, Get a little irritated when someone disagrees with you, eh?
     
  12. spitter

    spitter Well-Known Member TS Supporters

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    Tripod...

    How do you disenfranchise everyone on Social Security - I'm sure you weren't necessarily including them, but those who make less than the threshold, who pay no tax would fall into that catgeory.

    Jay
     
  13. Tron

    Tron Supporting Vendor Supporting Vendor

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    Kitty says "Gracias".

    Tron
     
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