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Monday Humor

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by BRGII, Jul 20, 2009.

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  1. BRGII

    BRGII TS Member

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2008
    Messages:
    740
    One day my housework-challenged husband decided
    to wash his Sweatshirt .

    Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room,
    he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the
    washing machine?' 'It depends,' I replied.
    'What does it say on your shirt?' He yelled back, '
    OHIO STATE ! ' And they say blondes are dumb....

    --
    A couple is lying in bed.. The man says,
    'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world..'
    The woman replies, 'I'll miss you........

    --
    'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,'
    Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what
    do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'
    'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.

    --
    Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
    A: A rumor

    --
    Dear Lord, pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
    Love to forgive him; and Patience for his moods.
    Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to
    death. AMEN

    --
    Q: Why do little boys whine?
    A: They are practicing to be men.

    --
    Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
    A: Trustworthy.

    --
    Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping
    for breath and calling your name?
    A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.

    --
    Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the
    toilet?
    A: It helps them remember which end to wipe..

    --
    Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
    A: Rename the email folder 'Instruction Manuals'
     
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