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Monday Humor

Discussion in 'Uncategorized Threads' started by 100straight, Apr 14, 2008.

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  1. 100straight

    100straight Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    584
    Fifty-one years ago, Herman James, a North Carolina mountain man, was drafted by the Army.

    On his first day in basic training, the Army issued him a comb. That afternoon the Army barber sheared off all his hair.

    On his second day, the Army issued Herman a toothbrush. That afternoon the Army dentist yanked seven of his teeth.

    On the third day, the Army issued Herman a jock strap. The Army has been looking for Herman for 51 years.
     
  2. Recoil Sissy

    Recoil Sissy Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    2,650
    HOW TO SAVE THE AIRLINES

    Dump the male flight attendants. No one wanted them in the first place. Replace all the female flight attendants with strippers! What the heck -- they don't even serve food anymore, so what's the loss?

    Strippers would at least triple alcohol sales and get a "party atmosphere" going in the cabin. Of course, every businessman in the country would start flying again, hoping to see naked women.

    Because of the tips, female ‘flight attendants’ wouldn't need a salary, thus saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good we could charge the women for working the plane and have them kick back 20% of the tips, including lap dances and "special services."

    Muslim terrorists would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women. Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues.

    This is definitely a win-win situation if we handle it right --- a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.

    Why didn't Bush think of this? Why do I still have to do everything myself?

    Sincerely,


    Bill Clinton
     
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