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MN DOG SQUAD SHOOTS THE DIXIE

Discussion in 'Shooting Related Threads' started by Pride Engineer, Jan 25, 2011.

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  1. Pride Engineer

    Pride Engineer Member

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    Well, they are here in sunny Florida at the Dixie Grand. Well at least some of them are anyway. The Piddler is here. The Prez is here. Almost Hairless is here but no Schnauzer or The Big Dog. Rumor has it that the Schnauzer may be chasing some hot bitches back home and The Big Dog is maybe sharing a kennel with a couple of sweet pooches with the required 150 pounders. It's hard to tell with those two but it's seems likely it's true.

    Monday started slowly except for Almost Hairless. He found all hundred in the singles to run away with class AA. He also tied in AA doubles for a carry over. The Piddler didn't do much but he did edge out The Prez this day. The poor Prez. He showed all the rust of a pup that spent the winter locked in a kennel. His singles and doubles looked like a pup hunting on three legs and wearing nose plugs.

    Tuesday was a tough day because of the wind but the caps seemed to bring out the best in our dogs. Both Almost Hairless and The Prez located 94's to bring home 7th and 8th place with the event high only 96 in very windy conditions. But the real story was The Piddler. Our Piddler managed to stumble onto 96 of the little buggers to tie some big shooter from Mo. and two others. Yes, it was our Piddler!!! The same doggy that hasn't had a yard punch for the last five years. The same guy that is a 22 yard retriever standing on the 27.

    Now if you readers find this hard to believe, you are not alone. The Prez, Almost Hairless and several others present could not believe what they saw. I mean the poor Piddler was so screwed up during the event he did several things that just weren't explainable. I mean on one trap he stopped the retrieving claiming Almost Hairless had shot out of turn when he had not. Now if that wasn't bad enough, he tried to retrieve trap three BEFORE we worked two! Imagine the scene, four retrievers waiting on field two while The Piddler was moving speakers on three! Despite these strange happenings, he held it together and made it to the championship shootoffs!

    The shootoffs were another story. There was our Piddler standing Mano Mano with none other than Leo himself. Yes, that Leo. The head dog in the country. Now to hear our Piddler bark, he claimed Leo was really scared to face our Piddler. In fact, The Piddler claimed he saw Leo's knees knocking as he approached the line. Well, Leo, Piddler and two others went head to head, tail to tail. When the last retrieve was in, The Piddler and Leo were beaten by the other two leaving them tied for 3rd and 4th. Now here is where the story line gets even more interesting. The Piddler claims Leo was now such a basket case of nerves he withdrew from further competion. Witnesses say Leo took one look at the looming storm clouds and decided 4th was good enough for him and simply withdrew. He obviously did not see the Piddlers now soaked "in that certain area" pants or maybe he would have just decided making The Piddler shoot in the upcoming rain might actually save face for the Piddler. In any case it was over. Leo went home to rest to likely participate in more shootoffs tomorrow and our Piddler went home to savor his sweet victory and the first punch he's had in what seems like forever.

    Reporting live from The Silver Dollar, Mark Zauhar, Dog Squad Scribe
     
  2. jeffprigge

    jeffprigge Active Member

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  3. JACK

    JACK Well-Known Member Supporting Vendor

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    "Da-Loot" breeds good dogs.
     
  4. slipping into darkness

    slipping into darkness TS Member

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    Keep up the find cometary, your post are refreshing and priceless. "slid"
     
  5. ric3677

    ric3677 Well-Known Member

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    finally...I didn't think the "dogs" would ever get out of the kennel.

    Rick in Mt.
     
  6. Del-Tone/Luth Gun Range

    Del-Tone/Luth Gun Range Member

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    Thanks for some laughs during this long cold winter. Keep the updates coming!!
     
  7. below 0

    below 0 TS Member

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    Shoot good Gentlemen, perhaps I'll see you "Dogs" at the Spring Grand...Odie
     
  8. Pride Engineer

    Pride Engineer Member

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    Wednesday is in the books. Not alot today happened except of course for our new found hero The Piddler. But you'll have to wait for that part. The Prez and Almost Hairless managed 97 and 98 in the singles on a very windy day. (There was but one 100!) Almost Hairless, no doubt deciding the wind was too much for his taste, retired to his camper kennel for the caps and doubles. Unfortunately for The Prez, he was much to smart to just give up. No, he proceeded to shoot the second all time low of his career in the caps. A number so low he was reluctant to share it. Let us say the union was founded in 17__ which remarkably has two numerals very similiar to his score. He did find 88 doubles though on a windy day that even Harlan Campbell could only locate 90.

    Now for the real story. Our Piddler, the dog who in his words dominated big Leo in yesterdays shoot offs, carded the only perfect 100 in the days singles. Was he excited? Well, at first it was difficult to tell. Unlike yesterday when he was unable to control his excitment and did what his name says, staining his pants in the process, he appeared dry. Through the days handicaps and doubles, he appeared in perfect order. It was not until discussions after dinner that we may have learned why the days excitment did not appear to be visable on our Piddlers pants. Yes, his friend Precious Pam may have "spilled the beans" when it comes to the secret to The Piddlers well kept appearance. It seems The Piddler has turned to wearing Depends. Now considering his past record of winning trophies, it would seem to be a bit of an expense but that's our Piddler, always prepared.

    Thursday the Dogs get a chance at the caps and double retrieves. Will The Prez finally find a good score? Will Almost Hairless find his way out of the camper kennel? Will The Piddler keep up his wicked pace? Will the extra large package of plastic pants be enough for The Piddler to last through the day? Check in tomorrow for the details.

    Mark and Lindsay Zauhar, President and Vice-President of the Minnesota Dog Squad fan club.
     
  9. sm519

    sm519 Member

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    Prez, don't forget to tell all your admirers that it took that new fangled e-mail notice to you to get you out of your kennel and up to the keyboard. Just remember who had to stir your dog dish to get any report out of you. Congrats on melting your rust or is that snow off your game and finding respectability.
    Hope to be there in March for the Southern Grand.
     
  10. scott calhoun

    scott calhoun Well-Known Member

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    John Hiter.
     
  11. Pride Engineer

    Pride Engineer Member

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    Thursdays shooting is over and the dogs were happy it was. The poor Prez had another handicap score in the 70's. Both Almost Hairless and The Piddler were in the 80's. In the doubles, the situation was reversed with The Prez finding 90 and the other dogs in the 80's. Now the truth is, all scores have been low so far this week but the dogs, with the exception of the first two days, have so far been out of this field trial.

    Of course the real story behind the dogs usually has little to do with their retrieving. Today was no exception. In an attempt to determine what has turned our Piddler into a winner after so many years of less then stellar retrieving, I spent several hours with The Piddlers close companion, Precious Pam. What I found was, shall we say, interesting at the very least. It seems that the rumor about the Depends may in fact be true. Now Pam would not confirm or deny the accuracy of this damp rumor but the look on her face left me with no doubts. Of course, seeing the now empty Depends box in The Piddlers trash can helped confirm my suspicions. But unfortunately, the Depends are only part of the story. They obviously kept our wet retriever's pants dry and his confidence up, but something more was behind this story. What made him find birds at a rate we have never seen before from The Piddler? Then, in an obvious slip of the tongue, or maybe it was the sound of tape on plastic, but what ever it was, Precious Pam finally revealed the secret behind The Piddlers sudden rise to the challenge. It seems The Piddler has determined that having sex just before he shoots gives him an edge. Now why this would help is anyones guess. Whatever it is we certainly can't be sure. One thing is for certain however, it explains why The Piddler was late for the first and second event today. It explains why he needed to "get a different color of lenses" between traps 2&3, in both events!! It also explains his three hour absence from the group between events. Yes, it certainly answered many questions.

    Reporting live from the Silver Dollar, Mark Zauhar, newly employed Masters and Johnson Research Assistant
     
  12. WoodsonEnt

    WoodsonEnt Active Member

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  13. JACK

    JACK Well-Known Member Supporting Vendor

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    3 hours? He's exhausted.
     
  14. Duluth Fatboy

    Duluth Fatboy Banned User Banned

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    Two days left, will the poor Prez get on the winning track again? Looks like the winds will lighten for singles today.

    The Piddler
     
  15. dverna

    dverna Active Member

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    If he lasts more than four hours he needs to get to the emergency room.

    Living better though chemistry can have consequences.

    Don Verna
     
  16. hounddog41@charter.net

    hounddog41@charter.net Member

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    Hi Piddler! How come no current postings ya all wore out? hounddog from superior
     
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