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Humor

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by TRW369, Dec 29, 2011.

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  1. TRW369

    TRW369 TS Member

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2009
    Messages:
    704
    I received a phone call early one morning approximately 4:00AM from a guy that asked the question "Is the coast clear" and I informed him that I live on the east coast and have no idea if it is or not. My wife woke up when the phone rang and asked me who is that on the phone at this early time of the morning.

    TRW369
     
  2. RickN

    RickN Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2008
    Messages:
    3,051
    Location:
    Minnysoda
    Ole & Lena lived by a lake in Nordern Minnesota. It vas early vinter
    and da lake had froze over.

    Ole asked Lena if she vould valk across da frozen lake to da yeneral
    store to get him some smokes. She asked him for some money, but he
    told her, “Nah, yust put it on our tab.”

    So Lena valked across, got the smokes at da general store, den walked
    back home across the lake. Ven she got home and gave Ole his smokes,
    she asked him, “Ole, you alvays tell me not to run up da tab at da
    store. Why didn’t you yust give me some money?”

    Ole replied, “Vell, I didn’t vant to send you out dere vit some money
    ven I vasn’t sure how tick the ice vas yet.”
     
  3. Claymuncher

    Claymuncher Member

    Joined:
    Oct 31, 2011
    Messages:
    837
    A physician, an engineer, and an attorney were discussing who among them belonged to the oldest of the three professions represented.

    The physician said, "Remember, on the sixth day God took a rib from Adam and fashioned Eve, making him the first surgeon. Therefore, medicine is the oldest profession."

    The engineer replied, "But, before that, God created the heavens and earth from chaos and confusion, and thus he was the first engineer. Therefore, engineering is an older profession than medicine."

    Then, the lawyer spoke up. "Yes," he said, "But who do you think created all of the chaos and confusion?"
     
  4. Barkingspider21

    Barkingspider21 Member

    Joined:
    Sep 18, 2009
    Messages:
    700
    Location:
    Semonole County Florida
    God did indeed do all that stuff but rumor has it that while he rested on the seventh day a Marine Recon Platoon infiltrated his perimeter and stole the Globe on which the placed a Navy anchor held in place by rope from the Air Force and that my friends is where the EAGLE, GLOBE AND ANCHOR OF THE CORPS originated and that it the truth :<) Woody Sullivan P.S. this was related to me by the Duty NCO on that day when the Lord Said" let there be light" and he threw the switch.
     
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