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How to create a Republican

Discussion in 'Uncategorized Threads' started by bigdogtx, Aug 19, 2008.

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  1. bigdogtx

    bigdogtx Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 5, 2006
    Messages:
    10,650
    I was talking to a friend of mine's little girl, and she said she wanted to be President some day. Both of her parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there, so I asked her, "If you were President what would be the first thing you would do?"

    She replied, "I'd give houses to all the homeless people."

    "Wow - what a worthy goal." I told her, "You don't have to wait until you're President to do that. You can come over to my house and mow, pull weeds, and sweep my yard, and I'll pay you $50.
    Then I'll take you over to the grocery store where the homeless guy hangs out, and you can give him the $50 to use toward a new house."

    She thought that over for a few seconds 'cause she's only 6. And while her Mom glared at me, she looked me straight in the eye and asked, "Why doesn't the homeless guy come over and do the work, and you can just pay him the $50?"

    And I said, "Welcome to the Republican Party."

    Her folks still aren't talking to me.
     
  2. KenC

    KenC Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    334
    Pay attention to what little kids say. They haven't yet learned to BS.
     
  3. riflegunbuilder

    riflegunbuilder Member

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2006
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    My brother was once a snivvly liberal. The first time he wrote the IRS a check he was cured. The little girl understood quick. After being in law enforcement for 20 years, I've learned that the more money you throw at "less fortunates" there are just more of them.
     
  4. John Thompson

    John Thompson TS Member

    Joined:
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    Messages:
    756
    Another sure way to make a conservative Republican is to mug a democrate.
     
  5. H82MIS

    H82MIS TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    2,052
    A biker is riding by the zoo, when he sees a little girl leaning into
    the lion's cage.

    Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the cuff of her jacket and tries to
    pull her inside to slaughter her, under the eyes of her screaming parents.

    The biker jumps off his bike, runs to the cage and hits the lion
    square on the nose with a powerful punch.

    Whimpering from the pain the lion jumps back letting go of the girl,
    and the biker brings her to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly.

    A New York Times reporter has watched the whole event. The reporter addressing the biker says, 'Sir, this was the most gallant and brave thing I saw a man do in my whole life.'

    The biker replies, 'Why, it was nothing, really, the lion was behind
    bars. I just saw this little kid in danger, and acted as I felt right.'

    The reporter says, 'Well, I'll make sure this won't go unnoticed. I'm
    a journalist from the New York Times, you know, and tomorrow's paper
    will have this story on the front page... So, what do you do for a living and
    what political affiliation do you have?''

    The biker replies, 'I'm a U.S. Marine and a Republican.'

    The journalist leaves.

    The following morning the biker buys The New York Times to see if it
    indeed brings news of his actions, and reads, on front page:

    U.S. MARINE ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT AND STEALS HIS LUNCH
     
  6. highflyer

    highflyer TS Member

    Joined:
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    Messages:
    2,474
    Teach a child to think logically and they will be a conservative. Liberals think with emotions and throw out logic. They don't let the facts get in the way. That is how they can support an idiot like Obama.
     
  7. Bruce Specht

    Bruce Specht Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    5,055
    Location:
    Near but not in chicago
    You taught the little girl a valuable lesson and got her to think thing out. Something democrats would rather have done for thme at tax payer expense. Hop her parents learned from the lesson and talk to you again sometime.
     
  8. highflyer

    highflyer TS Member

    Joined:
    Feb 1, 2006
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    2,474
    Liberals are wrong on every issue, not a few. It has to be a brain disease. A suicidal, self destructive brain disease. If you let them they will take you down with them. Fincher100 must have it.
     
  9. TLC Flying

    TLC Flying TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 11, 2006
    Messages:
    38
    It is OK to be a liberal. Even kind of honorable. Just don't vote for one. If only liberals were in charge, there would be no need to be liberal or conservative, the ruling class would decide that for you.
     
  10. Brian in Oregon

    Brian in Oregon Well-Known Member

    Joined:
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    25,248
    Location:
    Deplorable Bitter Clinger in Liberal La La Land
    Liberals DO vote with emotions and feelings. They've proudly stated so. Remember when Diane Fineswine, Nancy Peloser and Barbara Botoxer all proudly stood up for the year of women in politics and said they would vote with their hearts and feelings, not on cold calculated facts? Emotions over logic and reason.
     
  11. Bob_K

    Bob_K Well-Known Member

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    Location:
    Afton, Virginia
    If you are under 30 and don't vote Democrat, you don't have a heart. If you are over 30 and don't vote Republican, you don't have a brain.
     
  12. ShotgunTraveler

    ShotgunTraveler TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    36
    Bob_K,


    I am only 25 and the most conservative republican you will ever meet. Does that mean I don't have a heart?


    Joe
     
  13. ESMDHokie

    ESMDHokie TS Member

    Joined:
    Jul 31, 2008
    Messages:
    126
    I must be a heartless wretch
     
  14. highflyer

    highflyer TS Member

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    Feb 1, 2006
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    2,474
    I have heard that same quote many times. I started out as a liberal because I thought with my heart and not my brain. When you learn how to use your brain you can see that what your heart feels can leave people in ruin. I taught my children to think with their brain and be suspicious of everything they are taught in textbooks and on the evening news. As a result even my daughters are very conservative. All have graduated from college and have very good marriages with several conservative grandchildren on the way. When we get together as a family, including their spouses, there isn't a liberal in the bunch. Quite a contrast from the family I grew up in.
     
  15. W.P.T.

    W.P.T. TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    8,371
    Jim,

    Thats the best one I have seen or heard in a long time ... ROFLMO ... WPT ... (YAC) ...
     
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