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Home remedies

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by short shucker, Feb 2, 2010.

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  1. short shucker

    short shucker TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    3,939
    AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES:


    1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE
    ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP.


    2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY
    USING THE SINK.


    3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR
    A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.


    4. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM
    ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.


    5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL
    BE TOO AFRAID TO COUGH.


    6. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.


    7. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.


    DAILY THOUGHT: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES - NOT REALLY GOOD FOR
    ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.

    ss
     
  2. oskerspap12

    oskerspap12 Active Member

    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2009
    Messages:
    1,235
    Very funny..... Thanks for the laugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  3. short shucker

    short shucker TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    3,939
    I made this a little easier to read. I forgot to proof it when I posted it. Sorry for the all caps as it was copied from an email I received.

    oskerspap12,

    Glad you enjoyed it.

    ss
     
  4. senior smoke

    senior smoke Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2007
    Messages:
    7,565
    Location:
    Wauwatosa Wisconsin
    funny.
    steve balistreri
     
  5. KRK32

    KRK32 Member

    Joined:
    Feb 19, 2009
    Messages:
    274
    Location:
    TROY OHIO
    This almost like watching the red green show all were missing is some cut up vans and a scrap pile for parts. Kirk
     
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