1. Attention: We have put together a thread with tips and a tutorial video to help with using the new software. Please take a moment to check out the thread here: Trapshooters.com Tutorial & Help Video.
    Dismiss Notice

Friday joke

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by glenns, Aug 17, 2012.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. glenns

    glenns Member

    Joined:
    Jun 14, 2009
    Messages:
    537
    Location:
    Arizona
    Bob was sunbathing naked at the beach in Jamaica.

    For the sake of civility, and to keep "IT" from getting sun burned, he had a hat over his private parts.

    A woman walks past and says, snickering, "If you were a gentleman you'd lift your hat.."
    He raised an eyebrow and replied, "If you were better looking, it would lift
    itself."
     
  2. Rick Barker

    Rick Barker Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 25, 2009
    Messages:
    14,394
    Ouch


    Hey this reminds me, I have noticed a profound absence of jokes lately and I won't mention any names, but BB comes to mind.

    You guys (and you know who you are) are falling down on your job! ; )
     
  3. NMULTRARUNNER55

    NMULTRARUNNER55 Member

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2011
    Messages:
    425
    Ok, here's one:

    Q: What did the Iraqi woman say to her husband as they left their hut one morning?

    A: Do you think this bomb makes my butt look big?


    Steve Nunley

    Albuquerque, NM
     
  4. bigbore613

    bigbore613 Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    4,469
    Yesterday I was at my local Bj's buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Lucky, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think

    I had, an elephant?

    So since I'm uninhibited and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added
    ...
    that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

    I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is "nutritionally

    complete" so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story).

    Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's Ass and a car hit me.

    I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. Jeff
     
  5. Rick Barker

    Rick Barker Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 25, 2009
    Messages:
    14,394
    Hey, don't joke about old people's diet food.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.