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Ever feel stupid

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by porky, May 11, 2012.

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  1. porky

    porky TS Member

    Jan 29, 1998
    If you ever feel a little bit stupid, just dig this up and read it again; you'll begin to think you're a genius..

    (On September 17, 1994, Alabama's Heather Whitestone was selected as Miss America 1995.)
    Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
    Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever,"
    --Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.

    "Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean, I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."
    --Mariah Carey

    "Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life,"
    -- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign

    "I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body,"
    --Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.

    "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,"
    --Mayor Marion Barry, Washington , DC


    "That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it,"
    --A congressional candidate in Texas ...

    "Half this game is ninety percent mental."
    --Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark

    "I love California . I practically grew up in Phoenix ..."
    -- Dan Quayle

    "We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?"
    --Lee Iacocca

    "The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."
    --Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst.

    "We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people."
    -- Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor.

    "Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances."
    --Department of Social Services, Greenville , South Carolina

    "Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas."
    --Keppel Enderbery

    "If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record."
    --Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman 2007

    Feeling smarter yet?
  2. hoot619

    hoot619 Member

    Jan 29, 1998
    Hell Now you know sometimes how my thinking works. Ken U Finnish Genius by

    some of those I are one. LOL
  3. Catpower

    Catpower Molon Labe TS Supporters

    Jan 29, 1998
    In the Cabana
    Thanks, now I do feel smarter
  4. Rick Barker

    Rick Barker Well-Known Member

    May 25, 2009
    Only when I log onto this web site : )


    I notice you did not post some of the remarks of our resident trolls.

    Were their remarks TOO stupid to post?
  5. Brian in Oregon

    Brian in Oregon Well-Known Member

    Jan 29, 1998
    Deplorable Bitter Clinger in Liberal La La Land
    Cripes, just look at any post by skeety or trappy.
  6. RobertT

    RobertT Well-Known Member

    Jun 27, 2006
    Wouldn't have happened if they had a teleprompter.
  7. LFT687

    LFT687 Member

    Jul 30, 2008
    Every time I talk to a pretty girl!
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