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Divorce Agreement

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by Stu Pidash, Apr 6, 2009.

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  1. Stu Pidash

    Stu Pidash TS Member

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    When cutting and pasting it would be nice if it was done in a way to show paragraphs and such like the way it was originally written.

    Thanks for your post, good to read what you have to say, keep posting it is valued material ... thanks again.
     
  2. HSLDS

    HSLDS Well-Known Member

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    Bigunn,

    You need to hit 'return' in the spaces between paragraphs (essentially 'double spacing' the document) to preserve the correct line spacing...
     
  3. Recoil Sissy

    Recoil Sissy Well-Known Member

    Joined:
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    Messages:
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    These are likely not the original paragraph breaks but it IS easier to read this way...

    __________________

    DIVORCE AGREEMENT

    THIS IS SO INCREDIBLY WELL PUT AND I CAN HARDLY BELIEVE IT'S BY A YOUNG PERSON, A STUDENT!!! WHATEVER HE RUNS FOR, I'LL VOTE FOR HIM. OUTSTANDING.

    Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists and Obama supporters, et al: We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce.

    I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has run its course. Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.

    Here is a model separation agreement: Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.

    We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU. Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA and the military.

    You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell (You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them).

    We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart and Wall Street. You can have your beloved homeless, homeboys, hippies and illegal aliens.

    We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks. We'll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood.

    You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can have the peaceniks and war protesters.

    When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we'll help provide them security. We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism and Shirley McLane. You can also have the U.N., but we will no longer be paying the bill.

    We'll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Subaru station wagon you can find.

    You can give everyone healthcare if you can find any practicing doctors. We'll continue to believe healthcare is a luxury and not a right.

    We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem. I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing, Kum Ba Ya or We Are the World.

    We'll practice trickle down economics and you can give trickle up poverty your best shot. Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name and our flag. Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like minded liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree, just hit delete.

    In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you ANWAR which one of us will need whose help in 15 years..

    Sincerely, John J. Wall Law Student and an American

    P.S. Also, please take Barbara Streisand & Jane Fonda with you.
     
  4. Recoil Sissy

    Recoil Sissy Well-Known Member

    Joined:
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    2,641
    bigunn and all:

    If you post something that looks correct before you hit 'submit message' but it gets all run together when actually posted, click on the "edit/delete my post" found immediately below under your post.

    Then do as HSLDS says, edit the message by double spacing at the paragraph breaks. VOILA! (phonetic version: vwallaa!), You've just corrected the format.

    sissy
     
  5. stokinpls

    stokinpls Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    6,482
    "We will convey our deep appreciation for the Islamic faith, which has done so much over so many centuries to shape the world for the better, including my own country," Obama said.

    Can ANYONE give me an example of ANYTHING positive Islam has done for this nation?

    Or by "my own country", was he not referring to the US?"

    As someone suggested, "They did bring coffee into Europe during the their crusades."
     
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