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Dead Duck

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by redbone99, Mar 4, 2010.

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  1. redbone99

    redbone99 Member

    Jan 29, 1998
    A woman rushed her precious,but very limp duck to her veterinarian. As she laid her pet on the exam table,the vet quickly pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.
    After checking in several locations,he shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry Ma'am,but your duck is dead."
    The distressed woman wailed,"Are you sure? I just don't know if I can go on without my dear"Cuddles"
    Yes I'm pretty sure she's dead the vet replied.
    The woman pleaded,"But how do you know she isn't in a coma or something? I mean you haven't done any tests on her or anything.
    The vet rolled his eyes, "Well if you insist,I do have two tests that will determine absolutely if an animal is dead or not." The woman clinched her jaw and said, "Well what are you waiting for?" The vet quickly turned around and left the room.He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Reriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement,the dog stood on his hind legs,put his front paws on the exam table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. The Lab then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog on the head and took him out of the room.A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and proceeded to delicately sniff the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches,shook its head, Meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
    The vet looked at the woman and said I'm truly sorry,but as I first thought,this is a 100% certifiably,dead duck.
    As the woman began crying again,the vet turned to his computer,hit a few keys and produced a bill,which he handed to her. Still in shock,she took the bill and read it. "$150!" she wailed! $150 just to tell me my duck is dead!
    The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry,If you had taken my word for it,I would have only charged you $20,but the "Lab Report' and the 'Cat Scan',are not cheap,so your total cost now is $150!
  2. Model Number 12

    Model Number 12 TS Member

    Dec 21, 2008
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