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Blonde jokes - rerun

Discussion in 'Uncategorized Threads' started by Bob Schultz, Mar 7, 2007.

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  1. Bob Schultz

    Bob Schultz Well-Known Member Supporting Vendor

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    Location:
    Tuxedo NC
    Do you know how to put a twinkle in a blonde's eye's? ...put a flashlight in her ear.
     
  2. Dynokick189

    Dynokick189 TS Member

    Joined:
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    Messages:
    80
    PC blonde joke:
    So this person of indeterminate gender and neutral hair color comes home only to find their home invaded and ransacked. The police arrive and the cop tell the person of indeterminate gender and neutral hair color. "Please wait here, the perpetrator may still be on the premised". So another cop from the K-9 unit shows up and goes into the house w/a big German shepard.
    "OH GREAT!" Said the person of indeterminate gender and neutral hair color... "they're sending in a BLIND COP!!!"
    Snicker, snicker... chortle, chortle, guffaw, guffaw!!!
    Mike (short, fat, male w/grey hair).
     
  3. Bob_K

    Bob_K Well-Known Member

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    Messages:
    1,465
    Location:
    Afton, Virginia
    A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started." Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?" The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."

    Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger."

    He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then .." He sighed................ "Let's put all the Frosted Flakes back in the box......."
     
  4. calilori

    calilori TS Member

    Joined:
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    So a blonde's house catches on fire and she runs to the neighbor's house and calls 911. The operator asks her for her address. The blonde doesn't know her address, so the operator asks for directions. The blonde is confused so the operator decides to simplify things a bit and says "How do we get to your house?" The blonde says, "Big red firetruck. DUH!"
     
  5. W.P.T.

    W.P.T. TS Member

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    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    8,371
    This isn't a Blonde Joke, but cute none the less ...

    Sven and Ole' got laid off at the factory where they worked and went down to the unemployment office ... The Ladie asked Ole' what his job title was and he told her he sewed the elastic in ladies underware, she looked it up and informed him that it was an unskilled job and he would be getting $300 per week in benefits ... Then Sven walked into the office and she inquired again as to what his job title was and he told her he was a "Diesel Fitter", the lady looked up his job by description and told him he would be getting $600 per week being as his job was considered to be skilled labor ...

    Then Sven and Ole' were sitting at the local bar having a beer and Sven told Ole' about his $600 unemployment benefit and Ole's stormed off to the Unemployment office and asked the lady why the big difference in benefits and she explained that his job was non skilled and Sven was a skilled labor postition ... Ole then told her He sews in the elastic and Sven puts them on his head and says "Yep Diesel Fitter" ... WPT ... (YAC) ...
     
  6. dbcook

    dbcook TS Member

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    1,157
    do you know why blond jokes are so short??????? so men can remember themm..there you go girls.have fun with that one
     
  7. Bob_K

    Bob_K Well-Known Member

    Joined:
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    Messages:
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    Location:
    Afton, Virginia
    One winter morning a couple was listening to the radio over
    breakfast.

    They hear the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10
    inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered
    side of the street, so the snowplows can get through."

    Norman's wife goes out and moves her car.

    A week later while they are eating breakfast again, the radio
    announcer says, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You
    must park your car on the odd-numbered side of the street, so the
    snowplows can get through."

    Norman's wife goes out and moves her car again.

    The next week they are again having breakfast, when the radio
    announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today.
    You must park ....Then the power goes out.

    Norman's wife is very upset, and with a worried look on her
    face she says, "Honey, I don't know what to do! Which side of the

    street do I need to park on so the snowplows can get through?"

    With the love and understanding in his voice, that all men who
    are married to blondes exhibit, Norman says.

    "Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time?"
     
  8. recurvyarcher

    recurvyarcher Well-Known Member

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    Messages:
    6,450
    Q: How can you tell if a blonde writes mysteries?


    A: She has a checkbook.
     
  9. EDGARMCM

    EDGARMCM TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    155
    Blonde is a fast fod resturant. The drink cup had tab on it you could pull off to see if you won a prize. The Blonde pulls off the tab anc becomes very excited an said "I won a motor home, I won a motor home". Waitress comes over and looks at the tab. It says, "You win a bagel"
     
  10. Hauxfan

    Hauxfan Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    4,947
    Do you know the differance between a Blonde and a washing machine????


    After you do a load in a washing machine it won't follow you around all day.

    Hauxfan!
     
  11. Hauxfan

    Hauxfan Well-Known Member

    Joined:
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    Messages:
    4,947
    Sorry, OIC........Hell to get old. Don't go there!

    I suppose it would be worse to be blonde too. lol

    Hauxfan!
     
  12. Hauxfan

    Hauxfan Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    4,947
    OIC, Right now I'm in the "thinking about it" stage.

    Haven't made up my mind for sure. Will have to check some things out first.

    Hauxfan!
     
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