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Betty and Bertha. Humor.

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by Barrelbulge(Fl), Jan 7, 2012.

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  1. Barrelbulge(Fl)

    Barrelbulge(Fl) TS Supporters TS Supporters

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    West Central Florida
    You gotta laugh at this one. Mike.

    Two 90-year-old women, Bertha and Betty, had been friends all of their lives.

    When it was clear that Bertha was dying, Betty visited her every day.

    One day Betty said, "Bertha, we both loved playing softball all our lives, and we played all through high school. Please do me one favor: when you get to heaven, somehow you must let me know if there's women's softball there."

    Bertha looked up at Betty from her deathbed and said, "Betty, you've been my best friend for many years. If it's at all possible, I'll do this favor for you."

    Shortly after that, Bertha died.

    A few nights later, Betty was awakened from a sound sleep by
    a blinding flash of white light and a voice calling out to her, "Betty, Betty."

    "Who is it," asked Betty, sitting up suddenly. "Who is it?"

    "Betty -- it's me, Bertha."

    "You're not Bertha. Bertha just died."

    "I'm telling you, it's me, Bertha," insisted the voice.

    "Bertha! Where are you?"

    "In heaven," replied Bertha. "I have some really good news and a little bad news."

    "Tell me the good news first," said Betty.

    "The good news," Bertha said with joy and enthusiasm, "is that there's women's softball in heaven. Better yet, all of our old buddies who died before me are here, too. Even better than that, we're all young again. Better still, it's always Springtime and it never rains or snows. And best of all, we can play softball all we want, and we never get tired."

    "That's fantastic," said Betty. "It's beyond my wildest dreams! So what's the bad
    news?"

    "You're pitching Tuesday."
    -------
    Life is uncertain - Eat dessert first!!!
     
  2. mette56

    mette56 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 8, 2008
    Messages:
    2,026
    Location:
    Camdenton, MO
    Cute, Bulge! And here's a follow-up story about Betty's husband Earl and Bertha's husband Jake.

    Two old drinking buddies Jake and Earl were discussing the fact that poor Jake had only days to live from a terrible disease. Jake said "Earl, I have a final wish to ask of you...at my funeral please pour a bottle of my favorite whiskey, Old Charter, over my grave in remembrance of me and our long friendship together". Earl said "Jake, with respect to you and our many years of drinking together, I understand and will carry out your wish". "And because we were such good friends for so many years, I know you won't mind if I pass that bottle of Old Charter through my kidneys first".

    OBTW, Jake and Bertha and Earl and Betty are all passed away now. Only fond memories remain.
     
  3. Bruce Specht

    Bruce Specht Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
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    Location:
    Near but not in chicago
    I recently visited Bulge for a few days, he and I went to his locl watering hole. After a few drinks he pointed across the bar towards two old drunks and said " thst's you in me in 10 years" at wich point I brought it to Bulges attention that we were sitting across from a mirror!
     
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