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ANOTHER STORY I DID NOT USE IN MY BOOK!

Discussion in 'Shooting Related Threads' started by senior smoke, Aug 1, 2009.

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  1. senior smoke

    senior smoke Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2007
    Messages:
    7,577
    Location:
    Wauwatosa Wisconsin
    HELLO;
    i am starting to feel better and i am almost done with my book. here is a story that didn't make it in my book.

    i have a cousin larry that is my age, he has always been ill since he was a kid. to my knowledge he does not work, he has a medical disability. his mother droped him off at my mom's house for a few days to visit. my mom calls me to come over and see my cousin. larry asked me what i was doing on saturday and i said my friend luther and i are driving to beaver dam for a ata trapshoot. my mother says that i should take larry. i said larry doesn't even shoot, he won't like it. he said i would really like to go and see you shoot. i was trying to get out of taking him due to one of his medical problems. that night which is a friday, i call luther and said i'll meet you at george webb resturant for coffee and we would discuss driving to the shoot saturday morning. i told luther at the resturant that my cousin larry is in town, and asked if he could come with us. luther says, whats wrong with him? i said he has a small medical problem. he said don't bs me, if he's a cousin of yours something must be wrong with him, otherwise you wouldn't be warning me about him. i said larry has some bag attached to his side. luther said for what? i said i think when he craps it goes in a bag. luther said why doesn't he crap like normal people? i said i don't really know. he said what else is wrong with him? i said when he laughs he usually farts. luther said that farten sob cousin of yours is not driving with us. i said luther, as long as we don't tell any jokes, he will be ok. i said if he can't tag along, i can't go shooting tomorrow. luther said ok, have him sit in the back seat with the window open. larry and i pick up luther at his house to drive to the shoot. we are a few blooks from his house and larry finds luther's southern accent funny and starts farting in the car while laughing. luther said turn the sob car around and take me back home. i said no!!! luther is red faced and pissed off at me and larry. i decide to start telling jokes and larry is literaly laughing his ass off. luther starts yelling at larry to stop laughing and farting because luther said he can't breath with the stench. i told luther not to yell at larry or i will lock the windows so he can't lower his. for 45 minutes this is going on. finally luther said i need to get out of this car!! i stop at a diner and luther is gasping for air as soon as he gets out of the car. we are seated to eat, and luther tells me not tell one fricken joke, he doesn't what my sob cousin farten while he is eating in the diner. our food comes, no one is speaking. the waitress says why are you guys so quiet? luther looks at me, i look at him and we start laughing and larry is going at it again. at the end of the day, luther said don't ever invite that farten sob cousin again to ever go shooting with us again. what ever that sob has, it's bad, and i don't want to catch whatever he has. larry says nice meeting you luther, luther said go f yourself, and walks into his house.
    steve
     
  2. crusha

    crusha TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    5,762
    This one didn't live up to your editorial standards?
     
  3. superxjeff

    superxjeff Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    3,781
    I heard that one before. Jeff
     
  4. birdogs

    birdogs TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    2,775
    I hope that you have a good editor who can translate your book into English - little things like punctuation, properly placed modifiers, etc.. I couldn't get past the first line.
     
  5. Ljutic111

    Ljutic111 TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2008
    Messages:
    1,730
    Maybe Birddogs has the same problem as Larry and can`t handle it ?? Love the storys Steve .
     
  6. puablo

    puablo Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 18, 2006
    Messages:
    2,378
    Keep it up Steve!!!!! puablo
     
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