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A little humor

Discussion in 'Off Topic Threads' started by George Steffes, Dec 29, 2010.

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  1. George Steffes

    George Steffes TS Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    149
    AAADD
    > KNOW THE SYMPTOMS.....PLEASE READ!
    >
    > Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder.
    > Somehow I feel better,even though I have it!!
    >
    > Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. -
    > Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.
    >
    > This is how it manifests:
    >
    > I decide to water my garden.
    > As I turn on the hose in the driveway,
    > I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.
    >
    > As I start toward the garage,
    > I notice mail on the porch table that
    > I brought up from the mail box earlier.
    >
    > I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.
    >
    > I lay my car keys on the table,
    > Put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table,
    > And notice that the can is full.
    >
    > So, I decide to put the bills back
    > On the table and take out the garbage first.
    >
    > But then I think,
    > Since I'm going to be near the mailbox
    > When I take out the garbage anyway,
    > I may as well pay the bills first.
    >
    > I take my check book off the table,
    > And see that there is only one check left.
    >
    > My extra checks are in my desk in the study,
    > So I go inside the house to my desk where
    > I find the can of Pepsi I'd been drinking
    >
    > I'm going to look for my checks,
    > But first I need to push the Pepsi aside
    > So that I don't accidentally knock it over.
    >
    > The Pepsi is getting warm,
    > And I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold..
    >
    > As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi,
    > A vase of flowers on the counter
    > Catches my eye--they need water.
    >
    > I put the Pepsi on the counter and
    > Discover my reading glasses that
    > I've been searching for all morning.
    >
    > I decide I better put them back on my desk,
    > But first I'm going to water the flowers.
    >
    > I set the glasses back down on the counter,
    > Fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.
    > Someone left it on the kitchen table.
    >
    > I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV,
    > I'll be looking for the remote,
    > But I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table,
    > So I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs,
    > But first I'll water the flowers.
    >
    > I pour some water in the flowers,
    > But quite a bit of it spills on the floor.
    >
    > So, I set the remote back on the table,
    > Get some towels and wipe up the spill.
    >
    > Then, I head down the hall trying to
    > Remember what I was planning to do.
    >
    > At the end of the day:
    > The car isn't washed
    > The bills aren't paid
    > There is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter
    > The flowers don't have enough water,
    > There is still only 1 check in my check book,
    > I can't find the remote,
    > I can't find my glasses,
    > And I don't remember what I did with the car keys.
    > Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today,
    > I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day,
    > And I'm really tired.
    >
    > I realize this is a serious problem,
    > And I'll try to get some help for it,
    >
    > Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
     
  2. Kevin Fleming

    Kevin Fleming Active Member

    Joined:
    Jul 19, 2007
    Messages:
    449
    AAADD - KNOW THE SYMPTOMS.....PLEASE READ!

    Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder. Somehow I feel better,even though I have it!!

    Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests: I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing. As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier. I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full. So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first. But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first. I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only one check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Pepsi I'd been drinking. I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Pepsi aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over. The Pepsi is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold. As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need water. I put the Pepsi on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning. I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I'll be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers. I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor. So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill. Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do. At the end of the day: The car isn't washed, the bills aren't paid, there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter, the flowers don't have enough water, there is still only 1 check in my check book, I can't find the remote, I can't find my glasses, and I don't remember what I did with the car keys. Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day, and I'm really tired. I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it. Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!
     
  3. DB Bill

    DB Bill Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 1998
    Messages:
    1,012
    There must be more than one paragraph somewhere in all of that.
     
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